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Moving account of the struggle to adopt a child.
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Moving account of the struggle to adopt a child. |
From Kirkus Reviews: The warm-hearted story of a couple with a natural child, Jeff, takes in all aspects of adoptive parents and adopted children. For the Cadys realized that Jeff was spoiled, that they needed another child—and found Janie when she was two. The changes Janie brought about, in the house, in Jeff and in themselves, made happiness for all and although the author held out against another adoption, he finally gave in and there were Husle and Sherry to be warmly welcomed by the other two children. Widely spaced, the four gave rise to much comment, on the part of relatives and friends, and Jeff’s problems were no worse nor better than those of the three girls. Each of the four created different situations, in temperament and health, and in response to household situations, but this defence of adoption leaves no doubt as to its value. There is discussion of the wrong side of the question—couples and homes not suitable, the rules and regulations of the agencies, the imperfect baby, etc.—there is the feeling of the two now grown-up children—and there is the natural, rather than the forced, humor of their family life. Not a sociological treatise but a sincere, thoughtful and often amusing balance sheet of more than documentary interest. |
From the Dust Jacket:
The Extraordinary story of Nkosi Johnson, the South African boy born with AIDS, whose stouthearted insistence that every child’s life is important brought great change to his country and made Nkosi, in Nelson Mandela’s words, “an icon of the struggle for life” for millions of people in Africa and around the world. Jim Wooten is one of America’s most seasoned and distinguished foreign correspondents, which means, among other things, that over the course of his long career he has seen his share of human tragedy, across Africa and around the world. He thought there was nothing he could ever see that would bridge the distance a reporter must necessarily maintain from his subject. He certainly didn’t think there was anything about life he could learn from an eleven-year-old boy. But then he met Nkosi Johnson, and his foster mother, Gail. Nkosi’s birthright was the cruelest imaginable: born into desperate poverty in an anonymous rural shantytown, infected with the HIV virus in the womb of his ailing mother, he was given only a few years to live. But his mother found it within herself to commit a brave and selfless act before she died: to cross the chasm of race and class in South Africa and bring her ailing son to an AIDS hospice for white patients set up in an affluent section of the country’s capital. The hospice’s founder, Gail Johnson, agreed to take Nkosi in, and when the hospice went bankrupt shortly thereafter, she raised the boy as her own. So began their journey together—a journey so incredible that by the time of Nkosi Johnson’s death from AIDS, the work he had done in his twelve years was such that his obituary ran on the front pages of newspapers around the world. Nkosi Johnson did not live to tell his own story, but one writer whose life he changed took up the work of telling it for him. In Jim Wooten’s hands, We Are All The Same is a powerful testament to the strength of the human spirit, even as it bears witness to the scope of the tragedy that is unfolding in Africa and around the world, cutting down millions of boys and girls like Nkosi Johnson before they can reach their promise. Five million more human beings around the world contracted HIV in the last year alone, a number that stuns us; perhaps the story of a remarkable child’s life can help us open our minds and hearts to the reality of the calamity we face. Written with the brevity and power of a parable, this is a book that is meant to be read by all of us. Its beginning and ending are terribly sad, but in the middle is the extraordinarily inspiring story of a very unlucky little boy who, with the help of his two mothers, was able to say Never mind. I’m going to make my life matter. And he did. About the Author: Jim Wooten is the senior correspondent for ABC News’s Nightline. He has served as a bureau chief, national correspondent, and White House correspondent for The New York Times. He is the recipient of the 2002 John Chancellor Award for Excellence in Journalism. He and his wife, Patience O’Connor, live in Washington, D.C. They have five daughters and six grandchildren. |
When faced with the prospect of being a one-child family, and yet having a strong desire for more children, this Midwest family embarks on what would become the adventure of their lives. Through the eyes of a mom, this book is written for all of us who know the joys and frustrations of foreign adoption as well those who may still be in God’s holding pattern as they struggle through whatever pains life may deal them. A book of hope and perseverance, We Have a Baby For You, will bring you deep into the details of one family’s journey, and encourage you in your own. Travel with this family to the Eastern European country of Romania in the days following the fall of Ceausescu, and watch as God opens doors, closes doors, and in some instances breaks down walls, to demonstrate His love for one special little boy and one faithful family. About the Author: Becky Foreman lives with her husband, Doug, and son, Tyler on their lakeside farm that has been owned by her family for many generations. Their daughter, Alissa, is in her first year at Northwestern College in Roseville, MN. Becky home-schools her son, Tyler, and has been active in her church. The Foremans would like to adopt again someday. |
From the Dust Jacket:
In this candid study of adoption in America today, adopting parents of white, black, multi-racial, and handicapped children of all ages describe their experiences from their initial decision through the post-adoptive period. The author crisscrossed the country and spoke not only to parents but to social workers, lawyers, legislators, directors of public and private agencies, volunteers, psychologists, doctors, even adult adoptees to obtain this realistic picture of the radically altered adoption situation. What is it like to raise an adopted child? The author vividly dramatizes cases of people who have made this decision: families who battled reluctant social workers before choosing a transracial child ... black families, who now find agencies sympathetic to their desire to adopt ... new parents of older children or handicapped ones facing years of medical care ... “single parents” who want to experience the joy of their own child ... foster families who want to keep forever the child that shares their home, but not their’ name ... and also the few whove failed and face the torture of returning their child. Including information on agencies and organizations who aid in adoption, We Take This Child will give encouragement and practical help to those who know that somewhere a child is waiting. About the Author: Claire Berman is a freelance writer who frequently writes on topics concerning children. A contributing editor to New York magazine, her work also has appeared in the New York Times Magazine, The Village Voice, Cosmopolitan, McCall’s, and Good Housekeeping. Mrs. Berman lives in New York City with her husband and three children. |
Many people take the journey to adopt, but not many can say that they won their child in a raffle. We did. This is our story. It is the story of hope, heartbreak, scams, fraud and ultimately success. It is a story to help inspire other people who are trying to navigate the ins and outs of the adoption process. It can be a very long journey but all I can say is, “Don’t give up. It will all be worth it!” |
The author grew up in New York City and dreamed of a business career in Manhattan. Moving to Vermont, he finds himself coping with bats, pigs, cows, chickens, goats, and a houseful of active children from across the world, who have become his family. He tells his story through a collection of anecdotes describing life in rural Vermont “on the prettiest dirt road you ever saw” in this often comical, sometimes touching, depiction of his family’s life—a completely different future from the one he’d imagined. A must read for anyone who has ever dreamed of coloring outside the lines. |
From the Publisher:
Welcome Home provides parents of foster and adopted children with practical skills for raising children of all ages, including information about attachment, behavior, counseling, education and practical strategies for day-to-day parenting. About the Author: Christopher J Alexander, Ph.D., is a child psychologist who maintains a private practice in New Mexico. Dr. Alexander provides counseling and psychological evaluations for foster and adopted children of all ages. By the Same Author: Diagnosis, Assessment & Treatment of Foster & Adopted Children: A Guide for Parents & Practitioners (2009, Christopher J Alexander, PhD & Associates). |
From the Back Cover:
In 2001, Americans adopted more than 20,000 children from other countries —a number that may reflect humanitarian motives and/or frustration with the domestic adoption system. Welcome Home! is a practical resource for anyone thinking of establishing a family or adding to his or her existing one. The book provides insight into the adoption process, open adoption, biracial adoption, adopting a special needs child, cultural attitudes, and how to handle an adopted child’s questions in later years. It also addresses specific adoption issues, including how to verify an agency’s credentials, how an agency negotiates with the birth mother, state and country laws and practices, tax benefits, and expenses such as legal and medical costs. About the Author: Lita Linzer Schwartz, Ph.D. is Distinguished Professor Emerita from Penn State, where she taught at Abington (formerly the Penn State Ogontz campus). She holds a Diplomate in Forensic Psychology from the American Board of Professional Psychology and is a Fellow of the American Psychological Association. Florence Whiteman Kaslow, Ph.D. is director of the Florida Couples and Family Institute, and president of Kaslow Associates in Palm Beach Gardens, Florida. She is also Visiting Professor of Medical Psychology in Psychiatry at Duke University Medical Center and Visiting Professor of Psychology at Florida Institute of Technology. In 2000, Dr. Kaslow received the American Psychology Association’s Award for Distinguished Contribution to the Advancement of International Psychology. She is board certified in clinical, family, and forensic psychology. Drs. Schwartz and Kaslow are coauthors of The Dynamics of Divorce and Painful Partings. Between them, they have authored or edited 40 books and numerous book chapters and scholarly articles. |
From the Back Cover:
“I began to realize that I would be spending many years growing up with a dual life. One with the Christians and one with the Jews.” So says Leonard Boulette, a Jewish lad who moved into a predominantly Christian community with his mother, father, and sister when he was four years old. Welcome to Bridgeview is his memoir. Now in his senior years, Boulette reflects on the great moments and the trials of his Jewish life. From his school days, to his years as a young adult in the military under threat of being shipped to Vietnam, to his eventual employment and marriage, throughout the book he asks the question: “Does everyone in the world need to have someone to be prejudice against in order to secure their own identity?” About the Author: Leonard Boulette encountered prejudice, yes, but he also met two wonderful fellows—a Catholic and a Protestant—who would become his allies in their encounters, challenges, and the curiosities of growing up. If nothing else, this thoughtful and eye-opening book pays tribute to the relationships that accompanied him through his life. |
Welcome to the Roller Coaster was written by fourteen foster moms who have fostered a combined total of over one hundred thirty-five children. They have come together to share their personal stories in order to provide a glimpse into the real world of foster care. Though many of their journeys have been difficult, these ladies will inspire you with their stories of love, loss, and healing. |
From the Back Cover:
Adoption is a big step which can change the whole dynamics of the family. It is crucial that parents understand the impact it has when new sibling relationships are forged as the adoptee becomes a part of the family. Welcoming a New Brother or Sister Through Adoption is a comprehensive yet accessible guide that describes the whole range of the adoption process and the effects of adoption on every member of the family, including the adopted child. It prepares families to have realistic expectations and equips them with knowledge to deal with a host of situations that may arise following the adoption. Questions like, “Did we make the right choice by adopting?” “How is this affecting our typical children?” “Will our adopted son or daughter heal?” are explored and solutions discussed in detail. All these, accompanied with real-life cases as examples, make it a realistic and insightful resource. This book is vital reading for adoptive families and professionals who work with them including social workers, counselors and psychologists. About the Author: Arleta James, MS, PCC, has been an adoption professional for a dozen years. She spent several years as a caseworker for the Pennsylvania Statewide Adoption Network placing foster children with adoptive families and then as the statewide Matching Specialist. She now works as a therapist providing services for attachment difficulties, childhood trauma, and issues related to adoption. She was the 1999 Pennsylvania Adpotion Professional of the Year. She is currently on staff at the Attachment and Bonding Center of Ohio. |
From the Dust Jacket:
In the tradition of My Mother/Myself and The Cinderella Complex, here is a book to give all mothers—young, old, novice, experienced, single, working—comfort long sought for one of the most debilitating of human conditions: the feeling of guilt that they have failed their children. Lynn Caine, author of the bestselling Widow and herself the mother of two children, has encouraging advice for the legion of the guilty: stop blaming yourself. It isn’t easy. Whether a child’s problem is trivial or more serious—or perhaps not really a problem at all—a mother’s reflexive reaction is to assume she’s responsible for it. She may not know whether hers are sins of omission or commission, but her gut conviction is that somehow she has sinned. This is not only a terrible burden to carry, it is a destructive one, costing her tranquillity, objectivity joy in her children and herself, genuine understanding. And because it is almost always unwarranted, it is a needless burden as well. Hope as we might, there are few, if any, guarantees when it comes to bringing up healthy children. More often than not, women set impossible standards for mothering, only to blame themselves for the inevitable failure. Although it is not Lynn Caine’s intention to minimize the mother’s role in shaping her child’s development, she proposes that there are many other components that contribute to the way a child turns out: genes, health, intelligence, temperament, fathers, peers, luck—and love. Using her own topsy-turvy experience as a case history, and drawing on guideline interviews with mothers, psychologists, educators, daughters, fathers, and support groups, Lynn Caine has written a wise, helpful, and profoundly personal book. She is forthright about the tumultuous years that followed her widowhood, when her son, Jon, was nine and her daughter, Buffy, five. Adding to their shared grief and to the self-blaming endemic to mothers was the frightening responsibility of the single parent. What she did and failed to do (and what she did right but could not recognize) in coping with the ups and downs of her children’s behavior will sound a familiar bell—for uncertainty dogs all mothers and few of us recognize and trust the enormous resilience of children. Her personal story is as instructive and rewarding as her thoughtful research, for through it she learned, as we do, of the futility of feeling guilty. This is a book relevant to all women who have longed to free themselves from the trap of maternal guilt. Practical, sane, optimistic, it is a guide that can truly release women to take the experience of mothering in stride—and to like themselves at last. About the Author: Lynn Caine lives in New York, and writes, teaches and lectures widely on women’s issues. She is the author of two highly regarded previous books, Widow and Lifelines, and is codirector of New Images for Widows, a non-profit organization. By the Same Author: Lifelines: Learning to Live Alone without Being Lonely (1978, Doubleday). |
From the Publisher:
What Every Adoptive Parent Needs to Know: Healing Your Child’s Wounded Heart is an essential resource for adoptive parents. As a young couple, Dan and Cassie Richards thought they had finally fulfilled their dream of having a family after adopting a beautiful little boy and girl. But they had unsuspectingly invited a Trojan horse into their hearts and home. While the children seemed happy on the outside, deep inside they were suffering from the hidden trauma that so many adopted children carry with them. This remarkable true-life story of raising two adopted children is a tale of hope and resilience, of two parents unprepared for their children’s psychological wounds that only time would reveal. Most importantly, it shows that profound healing is possible when adoptive families realize that traditional parenting is not enough. Because of the rejection, neglect, and abandonment they experience in the first few months of life, adopted children are imprinted with the subconscious belief that at their core they are unlovable and worthless, even if their new parents are nurturing and loving. They often decide that to depend on anyone who has the power to abandon them including their new parents is lethal. As a result, as they grow older they may develop attachment and identity issues, and their behaviors can become provocative and frightening to their parents. What Every Adoptive Parent Needs to Know offers adoptive parents and parents-to-be a solution. It shows that the journey to healing begins with moving beyond the misconception that the life of adopted children starts when they arrive in their new home. And it gives readers both the courage and information they need to create the breakthrough these children deserve. By following the threads of the Richards moving story, clarified by insightful analysis and practical advice from family therapist Kate Cremer-Vogel, this compelling book reveals how the effects of childhood wounds can be transformed with therapeutic parenting techniques. Both parents and professionals will learn how to recognize the most common signs of abandonment, attachment, and identity issues in children from behaviors such as lying, stealing, anger, and hatred expressed toward caregivers, to the inability to share joyfully in holidays, birthdays, and celebrations. Parents will learn how to reorient themselves to look at these behaviors not as reasons for punishment but as the child’s cries for help. As Cassie and Dan discovered, it is never too late to heal the wounded heart of a child with this powerful approach to parenting. About the Author: Kate Cremer-Vogel M.S., LCPC has been working with families since 1994. She specializes in the treatment of adoptees and their families, focusing on facilitating secure attachment. Using an empathic approach, Ms. Cremer-Vogel assists parents in bonding more deeply with their adopted child. Because it is the relationship between the primary parent and the child that is the conduit to the child’s thorough development and complete brain growth, Ms. Cremer-Vogel utilizes relational therapy to lead the parent and child into a more meaningful connection and understanding, deepening their mutual trust. Kate Cremer-Vogel has completed over 300 hundred hours of training with Daniel A. Hughes Ph.D., world-renowned specialist in bonding and attachment. She has also trained with Glen Cooper, Kent Hoffman, and Bert Powell of the Marycliff Institute in Spokane, WA, and Robert Marvin, who developed the Circle of Security(TM) Project; Alan Schore, Dan Siegel, Bruce Perry, Bessel van der Kolk, Regina Kupecky, Violet Oaklander, and those at the Gestalt Institute of Central Ohio. Dan and Cassie Richards have dedicated three decades of their lives to raising their adopted children, including completing several years of attachment-specific therapy aimed at improving their relationship with their children. They have worked with an international adoption agency in facilitating the adoption of children from overseas by families in their local community. These exceptional parents continue to assist adoptive families by spreading the news of hope and change on the state and national level. |
From the Dust Jacket:
In an exquisitely written memoir, Mia Farrow introduces us to the landscapes of her extraordinary life. Moving from her earliest memories of the walled gardens and rocky shores of western Ireland and her Hollywood childhood to her career as an actress, she writes of these experiences and her struggle to protect her children in a painful custody battle with Woody Allen. It was this crisis that led her to reflect upon the incidents that had brought her to a place so incomprehensible. Now, in What Falls Away, a memoir resonant not only in its honesty but also in its beautifully crafted prose, Mia Farrow speaks for the first time. She was born the third of seven children to the beautiful actress Maureen O’Sullivan and successful writer/director John Farrow, but the isolation of a polio ward brought her childhood to an abrupt end at the age of nine. Several years later, two deaths shattered the security of the family forever, and Mia Farrow embarked upon a journey that would lead her away from the convent education that was to sustain her spiritual courage, to starring roles in Peyton Place and Rosemary’s Baby, a marriage to Frank Sinatra, divorce, a defining trip to India, work on the London stage and in film, and marriage to André Previn. Their life together in England brought them three sons and three daughters before that marriage, too, dissolved and she returned to the United States. The year 1979 saw the beginning of a new career with brilliant performances in thirteen of Woody Allen’s most distinguished films. Told with grace and deep understanding, as well as humor, What Falls Away goes beneath the surface of this amazing life, with all its drama, success, and pain, and exposes the inner workings of a mind and spirit for whom truth, compassion, and faith are essential. Mia Farrow’s story is ultimately one of hope and courage in the face of difficulty; of commitment to others—most important of whom are her children; and of spiritual strength. Readers will not easily forget this remarkable book, even long after the last page has been turned. |
Caring for children damaged by abuse and delay is a tough and often thankless job. What Foster Parents Need to Know is a no-nonsense book by professionals and foster parents about how to navigate the system, deal with problem behavior, and be effective. A brief opening section describes how to keep a journal online or in a handy notebook. Keeping such a diary is easy and will provide valuable documentation for dealing with allegations, going to court in disputed adoptions, and preparing a Life Book. Also included is information on the five important adoption subsidies, tips on discipline, how to make your voice heard as a foster parent, and more. A practical resource for all foster parents, especially those who hope to adopt. |
From the Dust Jacket:
Alice Cohen was happy for the first time in years. After a difficult divorce she was engaged to a wonderful man, she was raising a beloved adopted daughter, and her career was blossoming. Then she started experiencing mysterious symptoms. After months of tests, X-rays, and hormone treatments, Alice was diagnosed with an abdominal tumor and sent for an emergency CAT scan that revealed the cause of her condition. She was six months pregnant. At age forty-four, with no prenatal care and no insurance coverage for a high-risk pregnancy, Alice was inundated with opinions from doctors and friends telling her what was ethical, what was loving, what was right. With the suspense of a thriller and the intimacy of a diary, Cohen describes her unexpected odyssey through doubt, a broken medical system, and the complex terrain of motherhood and family in today’s world. Ruefully funny, wickedly candid, What I Thought I Knew is a mystery, a love story, a philosophical quest, and a personal tour de force. About the Author: Alice Eve Cohen is a playwright, solo theater artist, and memoirist. She has written for Nickelodeon and PBS and received fellowships and grants from the New York State Council on the Arts and the National Endowment for the Arts. She teaches at The New School in New York City. |
From the Dust Jacket:
What I Want My Adopted Child to Know: An Adoptive Parent’s Perspective is a tender, revealing look at adoption from the parent perspective. Whether you are an adoptive parent, an adoptee, someone considering adoption, or simply curious about adoption dynamics, What I Want My Adopted Child to Know: An Adoptive Parent’s Perspective will touch your heart and increase your sensitivity to the challenges and joys that are unique to adoptive parenting. Bacchetta wrote the book in response to a need common among adoptive families. “Adoptive families navigate emotional terrain that fully biological families don’t have to. This is a book adoptive parents can give to their child and say, ‘I know adoption is painful, unsettling, joyous, and affirming. It’s that way for me too. More than anything, adoption is the way we came together, and I’ll always be grateful for that.’” Bacchetta’s words echo with the collective voice of over 100 adoptive parents interviewed for this book. With chapters like “I Would Do it All Again,” “You Are Not Different Because You Were Adopted,” and “I Regret What I Can’t Give You,” What I Want My Adopted Child to Know is by turns affirming, challenging, thoughtful, wistful, and poignant. About the Author: Sally Bacchetta is an award-winning writer and sales training consultant with more than a decade of experience in medical writing, magazine journalism, and corporate communications. She draws on her educational and professional background in psychology and counseling to illuminate the private thoughts of adoptive parents with sensitivity and startling honesty. Sally is the Rochester Adoptive Families Examiner and her articles have appeared in national magazines and local publications including Genesee Valley Parent magazine. For more information visit www.TheAdoptiveParent.com. |
Preparing for adoption involves more than setting up a nursery. It also means learning how to be more sensitive to the needs of adoptees, so adoptive parents can be better prepared when their adopted children deal with emotional issues concerning their adoption. Besides addressing thoughtless comments regarding adoption, this article exposes several of the myths linked with adoption. It also explains the losses linked with adoption and how it’s important for everyone involved in the adoption triangle to grieve the losses and then move on with their lives. |
Johnny had been through a lot in his five years, even being beaten as a baby for crying. He was suspended from kindergarten and was headed to his sixth foster home. Johnny didn’t know his new foster parents were Dorothy and Manuel Perez, who had a passion for helping children. Johnny was their ninety-fourth child in forty-five years of parenting. Dorothy tells the triumphs and tears of being parents—biological, foster and adoptive. This is a unique tale of a bi-cultural couple with big hearts; a man who taught special needs children at school and at home, and a woman who always had room for one more child. |
From the Back Cover:
What Led Me to You is the story of how a mother’s faith and family grew in ways she never expected. Carrie became a foster parent hoping to show the love of Jesus to children in need. She soon discovered that she also was in need of His love, more than ever. It wasn’t until God started to peel back layers in Carrie’s life that she learned how to put her trust in God. As Carrie started seeking God’s will, her life became less like the cookie-cutter shape she had imagined and more the shape God intended for her family. About the Author: Carrie Dahlin lives near Portland, Oregon with her husband and children. She studied human development at Warner Pacific college. She is passionate about connecting with foster families and parents with children who have special needs. |
From the Dust Jacket:
She was found in darkness—the bruised, comatose first-grader who would never wake up to tell anyone which of the two adults in the small, filthy Greenwich Village apartment had beaten her. Although on January 30, 1989, Joel Steinberg was found guilty of first-degree manslaughter after a twelve-week, nationally televised trial in which his former lover, Hedda Nussbaum, was the star prosecution witness, the story of what really happened to Lisa Steinberg remains as mysterious and inconclusive as Henry James’s The Turn of the Screw, which is also about children at the mercy of evil surrogate parents who use them in their games with each other. “The truth will set you free,” Nussbaum wrote Steinberg shortly after Lisa’s death. But “why should either of them—collaborators in the destruction of a child—have been set free?” Joyce Johnson asks, as she questions the moral validity of what swiftly became known to attorneys as the “Hedda Nussbaum defense.” Its basic premise: that a battered woman cannot be held responsible for failing to act to prevent the abuse of a child or perhaps even for participating in it herself. Attorney Joel Steinberg and former children’s book editor Hedda Nussbaum were neither Lisa’s natural nor her adoptive father and mother. The loopholes in the adoption system—part of our nation’s glaring failure to protect children—had enabled them irresponsibly to acquire both Lisa and her sixteen-month-old “brother,” Mitchell, as infants. The unmarried couple would never have passed inspection, for despite their professional credentials, they had come to belong more to the criminal underworld than to the upper middle class. Cocaine dealers, prostitutes, distributors of pornography—these were the people they chose to associate with. Lisa Steinberg’s death was the culmination of years of cocaine abuse on the part of Steinberg and Nussbaum, years of their narcissistic pursuit of sensual gratification through the escalating brutality of their own relationship. In this compelling, passionately written, often devastating book, Joyce Johnson not only examines the mysteries still surrounding Lisa Steinberg’s death but also addresses the even more painful question of how she lived, in a harrowing account of what is known about her last days and hours, when no one acted to save her. What happens to a child when her life is secondary to the dangerous and obsessive needs of adults? In a time when the physical and sexual abuse of children has risen dramatically with the incidence of drug abuse, Lisa Steinberg becomes emblematic of thousands of other small, nameless victims of societal indifference and adult madness. Johnson’s acute psychological insight has enabled her to see beyond the headlines and to interpret the truth, lies, and mythology of the Steinberg case with power and resonance. About the Author: Joyce Johnson teaches in the Columbia Graduate Writing Program and is a contributing editor [at] The New Yorker, Harper’s Fame, Redbook, Ms., Cosmopolitan, and The New York Times Book Review. She lives in New York City and Vermont. |
From the Publisher:
When I awoke one morning years ago, I realized I’d had a vision! I saw babies, lots of babies, superimposed upon one another and going on and on into the heavens. I felt thrilled by it, and yet I did not know what to think about it in relation to our family and our circumstances. I prayed, I talked to my husband, and I stayed in a seeking and searching attitude as I read my Bible and pursued God about the meaning of the vision. Six years later, back in our hometown, Reno, NV, we began foster care and the babies and toddlers began to arrive. In the book, I discuss the perks and snags of fostering, how the system worked, and how we fit into it. I also suggest ways to succeed as a husband and wife, and as part of a team in cooperation with the social workers and the biological parents. About the Author: Dan and Georgann Lemaire have been married 36 years. They have five fantastic sons and three fabulous daughters-in-law, and six amazing grandchildren. They were foster parents for twelve years in Washoe County, Reno, Nevada. During that time they cared for fifty-two children: elementary school-age children, babies and toddlers, and 26 newborns straight from the hospital. They have been adoptive parents for their son, David, for 21 years. |
People choose to adopt a child for many different reasons. Whether you are unable to have biological children, or you want to add to the family that you already have, adoption can be an extremely rewarding experience. There are many factors to consider when you are deciding whether adoption is right for you. It is important to first examine your financial resources, your career path and your personal relationships before you choose to adopt a child. Adopting a child is one of the most generous things that you can do, but it is a process that also comes with many challenges and frustrations. If you’ve assessed your situation and decided to pursue an adoption, there are several different paths that you can take. You can use a qualified adoption agency in the United States to adopt a child. You may also want to consider options such as foster-care adoptions, or conducting an independent adoption with the help of an attorney. International adoptions also provide a range of possibilities for prospective adoptive parents. It is vital that before you begin your journey with adoption, you understand the risks and benefits associated with the different types of adoptions before you decide the path that is best for your family. Adopting a child can be a long and expensive process that can also have serious emotional and psychological implications. Above all else, adopting a child is about giving love and opportunity to a child in need. Be sure to talk to all of the members of your family before deciding on adoption in order to understand any fears or concerns they may have about the process. The process of adopting a child can be frustrating, so it is important to learn as much as possible before you embark on this journey. |
As would-be parents cycle through the adoption process, they balance anxiety and fear with the life-altering decision of adoption. The emotional toll of this dance can be completely overwhelming and can confuse parents while navigating the decisions of how to expand their families. Drawing on extensive research and the author’s own experience of being adopted, What to Expect When You’re Adopting does not gloss over the realities of the adoption process, but rather leads parents through the many stages and emotional aspects involved and offer practical and sensitive advice allowing you to: • Make crucial decisions with confidence • Build a strong foundation for your family • Separate the myths about adopted children from the realities • Discover the key to healthy attachment with your child Dr. Palmer will also deal with the issues of single-parent adoption, infertility and, unusually, the option of remaining childless. |
The kids are screaming. The house is a mess. You just wanted to make a difference, and this is not what you had in mind. You can have a calm and peaceful home. You can make a difference in the lives of children. You can raise amazing kids in spite of the demands, stresses, and limitations of the foster care system. What Works: How to Raise Amazing Kids in Spite of the Foster Care System provides a step-by-step approach to: • Discipline • Succeeding in education • Handling the holidays • Developing consistent routines • Equipping children to become productive, well-balanced adults This system was developed by Stacey Addison, a school teacher and mother of six foster children. She and her husband later adopted the six kids and continued to work full time while raising them. She has seen her home turn from chaos to a peaceful, caring environment after developing the methods described in this book. This is a system to help parents avoid making rash decisions based on emotions, and instead, maintain and enforce consistent expectations. While it was written with the parents of foster and adopted children in mind, the approaches will work for any family. It offers simple, concrete solutions and strategies to overcome the challenges of parenting. Most importantly, it works! |
From the Back Cover:
We had told Daisy that first night of the introductions that she was going to get picked up from school halfway through the next day, and spend the late afternoon with Tom right until his bedtime at the foster carer’s. What actually happened was that Daisy sat and watched as the foster carer’s son territorially guarded what Daisy had been led to believe by everyone else was her new baby brother. This is the story of how Daisy and her parents adopted Tom. Although written by her mother, it is really six-year-old Daisy’s story. In this humorous and poignant account, Daisy’s thoughts and feelings about the family’s decision to adopt Tom and her perspective on the adoption process are brought vividly to life. Honest and accessible, When Daisy Met Tommy charts the joys and frustrations of the adoption process for Daisy, as well as her parents’ determination to protect their daughter during this testing, yet ultimately rewarding, journey. About the Author: Jules Belle is Southern by birth, was adopted by the Midlands at six and fostered by the North as a student. Aged nine, armed with her mother’s typewriter, she hammered out a screenplay for eighties icon Michael J. Fox. She has not looked back and has written ever since, most notably lists, and is working on her first novel. |
Noting that meeting foster children’s needs with sensitivity and compassion creates challenges for foster parents and helping professionals, this booklet narrates the experiences of two foster children to launch a discussion of challenges faced by foster children and appropriate child welfare intervention strategies. Part 1 tells the story of Karli and her infant brother Jon who are removed from their home in the middle of the night and placed in separate foster homes. Part 2 identifies nine challenges illustrated by the children’s experiences and relevant caseworker strategies: (1) when a child is placed in foster care, a series of unpredictable events occur; (2) although foster parents and helping professions feel negatively toward the biological parent because of their abusive or neglectful practices, the child sees nothing wrong with their parent; (3) the child is accustomed to raising siblings; (4) the child hears adult conversation about him/her; (5) it is not clear where the parents are when the child is removed; (6) changing schools; (7) the child is wary about meeting new people; (8) cultural differences in food, clothing, and customs; and (9) the child experiences conflicting feelings about visitation. The booklet concludes with a list of print, website, and organizational resources. |
From the Publisher:
Friends and family often have questions about the adoption process, but they may be embarrassed or afraid to ask them. This is a question and answer guide for them. It shows how they can be supportive to the adoptive family. When Friends Ask About Adoption would make a good gift for anyone who interacts with members of an adoptive family (neighbors, doctors, clergy, coaches, et al.). This book makes a great teacher present. About the Author: Teacher-writer-lecturer-parent, Linda Bothun blends her professional talents and personal interests. With the perception of an insider, she draws on her extensive research, adoption and post-adoption workshop experience, and clear writing style to deliver this important contribution to the field of parenting. Author of Dialogues About Adoption and editor of the PAAM Newsletter, she lives in the Nation’s Capital with her husband and two children. |
When Rain Hurts is the story of one mother’s quest to find a magical path of healing and forgiveness for her son, a boy so damaged by the double whammy of prenatal alcohol abuse and the stark rigors of Russian orphanage life that he was feral by the time of his adoption at age three. Bizarre behaviors, irrational thoughts, and dangerous preoccupations were the norm—no amount of love, it turns out, can untangle the effects of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. More people are coping with and caring for those affected by Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders than individuals living with autism, but because there is a stigma associated with this preventable, devastating birth defect, it is a pandemic of disability and tragedy that remains underreported and underexplored. When Rain Hurts puts an unapologetic face to living and coping with this tragedy while doggedly searching for a more hopeful outcome for one beautiful, innocent, but damaged little boy. |
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